I'm fat. I don't know what to do. I'm too out of shape. People will judge me. They'll laugh at how I do things wrong. They'll laugh at how slow I'm going. They'll think I'm not working hard enough and will look at me like I'm a slob that shouldn't be there. I'll be an eyesore. I'll hold other people back. I'll be the last person to catch up and people will have to wait for me ...
My answer back to all of those concerns/fears/insecurities - whatever you want to call them - is certainly not a "who cares?" It's a "who will laugh at you? you point that person out and believe me, they won't do that again. otherwise, focus on you and sweat those negative thoughts out of your mind."
You guys/gals, I've been in this industry a long time, and can I tell you something? Most people are not watching what you're doing, unless it's invasive to them. Most people are so involved in their own fitness endeavors, they're not stopping to make fun of someone striving to get healthier too. And, you know what? If someone is taking the time to put you or another person down, why would you value a person like that's opinion? Especially when the rest of us - trainers, managers, instructors dedicated to fitness - really and truly want you to win.
Weight is emotional. How we look at ourselves can be painful. And there are many reasons for that. I've had people cry - and I've cried with them - about not being able to walk because of a knee issue or because of "getting older" and being scared to fall, not being able to balance, being too big to sit on a bike in the Spin room, ashamed to get undressed to change in the locker rooms, a boyfriend (or girlfriend) not being attracted to them anymore - PHEW! It's never really about the weight or the fitness level, is it? It's always that thing lying underneath it all that makes it so hard to step out of our box of sorrows and embarrassment.
I tell people all the time, I still remember when I started running - I could barely jog 50 meters (if that). I remember VERY CLEARLY making landmarks while jogging - "just get to that lamp post" ... and it would be just a few feet away ... but, it was SO hard for me. Then, I remember FINALLY being able to run a whole mile - wow. I was so proud of myself. But, that took time. And, I did feel embarrassed, because I was in cross country and was one of the worst runners there. I WAS one of those people near the very end. I HAVE been that person that came in dead last. So, I do understand. However, I faced it. For those few people that I did notice shaking their heads like "man, she's really out of shape and probably shouldn't be running this race" there were tens and hundreds more people cheering me on. And here I am a fitness expert. I'm not a great runner now - average, I suppose - but, I have my own goals and I do it for my health.
A last note ... many of my clients often remark: "Renée, you and all these other trainers must really have a riot talking about how out of shape your clients are." Never. It always shocks me, because I rarely EVER talk about my clients to other. Moreover, when I do talk about them, it's always about how proud I am of what they've accomplished. It wouldn't even come into my head to put someone down in their presence or out. I'm proud of people for having the courage to achieve greater health and fitness.
To all who are embarrassed to start up, please remember you're not alone and that if you want something, you have to have enough faith in the good of the rest of us that we'll not hold you back from getting it. Celebrate you. You don't need to be the best. You don't need to worry about what other people think ... just keep moving. Most of us are rooting for you.
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